Faith healing

I recently performed a faith-healing on my two-year-old son’s stuffed puppy. Usually I feign veterinary skills or at least explain the need to take any ill member of his fabric menagerie to a veterinarian, but this time I needed the bathroom fast, so I simply placed my hands on the little toy canine’s head and cried out “you’re healed” in my best impression of a stereotypical evangelical preacher.
As I mused on my little mockery of that spiritual nonsense, I realized that even doing just pretend science is a more arduous task than doing pretend religion. Science is a rigorous and methodological examination of truth, while religion, astrology and all that nonsense have no such standards. And after all, those metaphysical systems are, in the end, all pretend.

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